Be Still, My Heart!!! - Page 3

Yep, Yep I look into those eyes again, those are deep, dark,and very intelligent.  Just what I would be looking for if I wanted a female.  But I want a male.  Sooooooooooo, go for it.  Nan

Marjorie, is it possible that the root of the DH's objection is really because the thought of a new dog in the house is just arising too soon after losing Missie T?   'Cause if that's the actual obstacle, we all know how easily those roadblocks move when that little pink puppy-tongue starts washing the face of the 'rational' partner...

I know your heart will always be in the breed, and you'll rescue every one you're able...but I was referring to you letting another GSD move directly INTO your heart and call it her own home.  Like you said--you NEVER pay much attention to the ads on here, and yet this one called out to you, and this puppy's eyes speak to you; IMO, it doesn't pay to ignore such signs.  It's akin to trying to outrun your destiny.

Marjorie, PLEASE don't lose your faith that there still are sound, HEALTHY German Shepherds out here, and breeders that WILL DO THE RIGHT THING. This girl is occupying your heart and soul just at the thought of her. SHE IS THE ONE to repair your broken heart. Think how wonderful it will be in 10-12 years when NONE of us are "getting around" as good as our German Shepherds are, and you are telling us about this wonderful girl, THAT YOU ALMOST LET SLIP THROUGH, YOUR HEART…..(And someone else is talking about the great years they got, FROM YOUR DOG )

No, DH isnt a *dog person* believe it or not.. He can take them or leave them- preferably leave them, but he is married to me, so he doesnt have much of a choice. He loves the dogs we have had, but they are not a part of his life, the way they are to me. I guess there is a lot going into this, now, as he is retiring soon. He may want to winter away, which is hard enough finding a place that will allow one GSD, let alone 2, one of which is  a pup. I , myself am still very distrught over losing Missie T- I think her eyes looked just like Missie T's, so thats why I noticed it.  There was always somebody home in Missie T's eyes.. This little girl has somebody home, too. Those old soul eyes show wisdom and they have seen it all.

I have actually had breeders offer me pups- they said they would send them with a ribbon around their necks, as DH doesnt want another but I know he would send the pup back. He is adament and I am so traumified by what I have been through, I couldnt ever go there again. I am very worried about Casey James. He is still young but his stance is *off*- or maybe I am looking too hard.

Marjorie
http://www.gsdbbr.org The German Shepherd Dog Breed Betterment Registry (a health registry for registered German Shepherds)
BE PROACTIVE!
http://mzjf.com --> The Degenerative Myelopathy Support Group http://www.mzjf.info/hgate Heaven's Gate 

Marjorie
I think you should follow the call of your heart, and puppies are such wonderful healers.

Maybe you should ask Casey James what he thinks?

I have done so much soul searching. I did think about Casey James. Missie T was so ill the last few months, and he patiently waited for *his* time, always being a good patient boy. I dont think it would be fair to him, just when he is finally getting my undivided attention to bring in a pup. I am still hurting so badly about the loss of Missie T.  I also cannot shake my fears, and thats not a healthy environment into which to bring a pup. It would be selfish of me :( Dogs read people like a book- they communicate through body language and my fears cannot be shaken. I analyzed why I wasnt fighting DH tooth and nail, for as you know, I am a fighter and when I truly believe something is right, with all my heart, I dont give up or back down.  I know my faults...LOL! Its her eyes and expression that look so much like Missie T's when Missie T was a pup. I cant be looking for a dog to be Missie T, and I am afraid thats what I was doing, and thats why I noticed her pic when I never notice any advertisments. Its the resemblance.. Its uncanny...Thats not a good reason to get a dog, because each one is its own special being. I think I am not ready, but I think I will never be ready. I danced in the fire too many times, and the scars will be borne for life- carried forever, as my own name... :(

Marjorie
http://www.gsdbbr.org The German Shepherd Dog Breed Betterment Registry (a health registry for registered German Shepherds)
BE PROACTIVE!
http://mzjf.com --> The Degenerative Myelopathy Support Group http://www.mzjf.info/hgate Heaven's Gate  

I'm sorry Marjorie, but I do understand. A couple of months after Kali passed I began looking at the classified ads, looking at females...after frantically wanting a couple of females that bore an uncanny likeness to my girl I gave it up. I was searching for her, as tho' she might be hiding from me in the classified. I know it sounds silly, but that's what I was doing, looking for Kali. I wasn't looking for another dog, & it occurred to me that any other female would only disappoint me, as none could fill her pawprints. It would not be fair to the new dog. And I could look far & wide, & never find one just the same...for there never will be another like her. Even tho' the head, the expression, the eyes, may look so like her......never will there be another Kali. Or another Missy T. Damn it, now I'm crying again....sorry. jackie harris

--- > I was searching for her, as tho' she might be hiding from me in the classified. I know it sounds silly, but that's what I was doing, looking for Kali.

No, Jackie, it doesnt sound silly to me, at all. Its so damn hard to lose a well loved furred family member. They are so much a part of our lives, sometimes it just impossible to let go... No, there will never be another like the ones we love and have lost. They leave their footprints on our hearts, each one with their own set... Missie T's footprints left drag marks all the way across my heart, and gouged deep...
Marjorie
http://www.gsdbbr.org The German Shepherd Dog Breed Betterment Registry (a health registry for registered German Shepherds)
BE PROACTIVE!
http://mzjf.com --> The Degenerative Myelopathy Support Group http://www.mzjf.info/hgate Heaven's Gate  

Marj,  I too understand. What you said about Missie T's pawprints on your heart just about broke my heart.
When I lost my first GSD at 9 I was not going to get another, for a while. We walked a very hard road too, though she didn't have DM,and I would never compare it to your terrible repeated experiences, though I too had a DM dog many years ago.

Soon, I found myself looking at websites, stalking people who I saw out and about with GSD's and 'just looking'. Of course I too was looking for my girl, I think we all do it unconsciously. Well the inevitable happened and I happened across a breeder I liked who had puppies on the ground. 3 out of 9 unspoken for. What to do? Just go and have a look of course. I will know I thought when I see the pups if I am ready, I will either be drawn to one or my heart will say no, not now.
The rest is history, and a puppy does help you heal - just by the sheer joy of their being and the hard work they bring!  That pup turned out to be nothing like my first girl, and very much her own *person* as each of them always are, but she is my heart and soul now - nearly 10 years on.

Casey James deserves *his* time, of course, for being a kind and patient boy, and I am sure that you are more than giving him that now. However, for my own dogs at least,  I know that one of their greatest joys is a companion of their own kind, and one of my greatest joys is seeing them have fun together.  

Try to allow yourself to heal at some time in the future.





 

She's cute as a button and adorable !   I can clearly see why she tugs on your heartstrings.